Deficit Pandering

Given the recent increase in readership here at TharpSter.Org as a result of daily letters from the past, I’ve come to the conclusion that sometimes my adoring audience will tolerate the occasional assault on quality writing in return for a few hundred words loaded with smart ass remarks, a picture, and a gag at the end.

Here in the information age where time is limited and multi-tasking reigns supreme, website hits increase when you can cater to the attention deficit disorder of the surfing audience. It’s actually quite ironic when you consider that the tools of the information age were created to help us use our time more efficiently. At best, we should have more time on our hands and not less.

Dude you aren’t going to believe this. For those of you with Uverse, tune into HDNet on late Saturday nights. They show Girls Gone Wild with no pixilation or pencil test failures.

Where was I?

Oh, yeah. What is the deal with all these young kids being diagnosed with the assorted attention deficit disorders and subsequently being medicated for it? It would seem that everywhere I turn I encounter yet another grade school aged kid who exhibits behavior which would have gotten those in my age demographic a smack upside the head back in the day.

It’s not that I favor one treatment method over the other. Obviously, the requisite treatment for any given diagnosis is case specific.

For that matter, what’s the deal with the brutal assault of Autocorrect on everything I type that has a letter from the bottom row of the standard QWERTY keyboard when I type these bad boys out on my iPhone?

I picked up a new iPhone 4s yesterday complete with a blue Otterbox case. Those initial hours of asking Siri who her daddy is and what she’s wearing are just about complete.

The diagnosis seems to be a more widespread phenomenon nowadays.

Nice bikini…. Or lack thereof.

As I see it, there would seem to be a few reasons for the increase in the diagnosis of ADHD or ADD these days.

  • Doctors, teachers. and parents appear to have the symptoms on their radar. My question is whether they’re looking for something that just isn’t there. We encountered that with my son many years ago.
  • Changes in our collective diets over the last 30 years have had unintended consequences on the fruit of our loins. Maybe a diet high in cholesterol and saturated fats helps keeps the little tykes focused.
  • Ooh, look. They’re wrestling in Jell-O.
  • Aliens from the Delta quadrant are using subliminal programming built into the butt puckering tone used on the Emergency Alert System to plot against us. One of their goals is to degrade our concentration levels so we won’t fight back.
  • Big Pharma is behind it in search for massive profits and other ill-gotten gains.
  • The imprinting that this generation’s crop of parents is putting on their new born children is subject to replicative fading, needs for frequent reboots, and general wonkiness.
  • Siri would you call the color of this case navy blue, royal blue, dark blue, or just blue?

Randy Tharp

TharpSter is a husband to one woman, a father to two kids, a master to two dogs, an occasional cubical occupant, and unable to make up his mind on an adequate theme for this website.

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